Seeing the Spiritual Practitioner Ego's Busyness While Sleeping
One ordinary evening, lying in bed, stray thoughts flying, emotions surging.
At that moment, I noticed a little ego busily issuing one new instruction after another: You should do this and that, you should adjust your breathing, you should stop identifying with your emotions and pain, your thoughts are not you, your stray thoughts are not you, and so on. “Listen to me. I am your ‘true self.’”
At that point, “I” realized: you are not the “true self.” You are just the “spiritual practitioner ego.”
Then “I” watched my thoughts grow even more scattered and confused. Random, illogical, surreal streams of consciousness began switching from one to another. I knew my brain was utterly exhausted, about to drift into that half-asleep, half-awake dream state.
Shut down.